My Own Concoction of Fairytales

Happy Ending

This is the way you left me,

I'm not pretending.

No hope, no love, no glory,

No Happy Ending.

This is the way that we love,

Like it's forever.

To live the rest of our life,

But not together.

Wake up in the morning, stumble on my life

Can't get no love without sacrifice

If anything should happen, I guess I wish you well

A little bit of heaven, but a little bit of hell

This is the hardest story that I've ever told

No hope, no love, no glory

Happy endings gone forever more

I feel as if I'm wasted

And I'm wastin' every day

This is the way you left me,

I'm not pretending.

No hope, no love, no glory,

No Happy Ending.

This is the way that we love,

Like it's forever.

Then live the rest of our life,

But not together.

2 o'clock in the morning, something's on my mind

Can't get no rest; keep walkin' around

If I pretend that nothin' ever went wrong, I can get to

my sleep

I can think that we just carried on

This is the hardest story that I've ever told

No hope, no love, no glory

Happy endings gone forever more

I feel as if I'm wasted

And I'm wastin' every day

This is the way you left me,

I'm not pretending.

No hope, no love, no glory,

No Happy Ending.

This is the way that we love,

Like it's forever.

Then live the rest of our life,

But not together.

A Little bit of love, little bit of love

Little bit of love, little bit of love[repeat]

This is the way you left me,

I'm not pretending.

No hope, no love, no glory,

No Happy Ending.

This is the way that we love,

Like it's forever.

To live the rest of our life,

But not together.

This is the way you left me,

I'm not pretending.

No hope, no love, no glory,

No Happy Ending.

This is the way that we love,

Like it's forever.

To live the rest of our life,

But not together.

This is the way you left me,

I'm not pretending.

No hope, no love, no glory,

No Happy Ending.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oFkSMHle8-M&feature=BF&list=FL102UbEccEGE&index=1

That is why I am making my own Happy Ending.

I am too fat. I feel like s*** today. Not a bad hair day again! I hate my chubby cheeks. I wish I can be prettier like (.....).

Sounds familiar?

I guess I am not the only girl who feels this way. Even the most confident girl must have faced some inferiority complex at one moment in time of her life. Is it normal then to feel so ... inadequate?

Perfection is what we strive for. But we do not always get it. Girls are so caught up with what people think of them that they get really paranoid and do all sorts of nonsensical stuff such as exercising excessively, dieting to the point of starvation, bulimia, anorexia etc. You name it, we did it (well at least one of it). However, the satisfaction is always short-lived. Why, the convoluted thoughts will manifest in itself and magnify each and every one of her faults to a unconscionable extent, worsening the physical damage upon herself.

WHY DO WE EVEN BOTHER.

Credits to Maggie Harrison

My dear friend out there; You are beautiful just the way you are.

Of kinship & dreams

Ali Cavanaugh - Falling Through Your Redolence

I guess whenever one feels under the weather, they tend to dream more in slumber. Unfortunately, it tends to be more horrifying rather than those cotton-candy dreams that can cause one to suffer from cavities. Fortunately for me, I do not have a habit of remembering them. So waking up in cold sweat in the middle of a rainstorm in the dark and realizing I was all alone at home should have made me scared. On the contrary, I was comforted. It is during this solitude that bad memories are evaluated and good memories are savoured.

Something rare happened tonight. My brother and I had a good two hour long chat about numerology, past relationships and our future paths in life. Astrology was so entrenched in the conversation that the feeling was akin to that of being in the same tent as a fortune teller. Gemini and Aries talk aside, I realized how much calmer and wiser he has become. He seems to be armed with this newfound worldliness within him that was absent before. In many ways than one, he has taught me various things about life and myself that I never knew existed. In other words (though I have never mentioned it), thank you for being the voice of reason and all the seeds of knowledge you have embedded in me. No matter how much my stubbornness consumes me, I will still remember how much he cares such as the time when instead of choosing to walk and playing with his friends, he boarded the school bus again to accompany his crying little sister home during her first day of primary school. :)

The horror leading to my heartache.

17 Rhinos killed in South Africa and Mozambique

HOW CAN PEOPLE BE SO THOUGHTLESS? Those syndicates selling rhino horns deserve to DIE. Especially now with China boosting its popularity of TCM, which leads to the demand for rhino horns as apparently it is an indispensable 'condiment' in their concoction to heal human beings through consumption of their medicine. How ironic is that? Kill a life (or more lives as I figured it may take more than 1 rhino horn to concoct the remedy) just to save another. An innocent one at that.

Here's a few important statements from the article itself:

"Research conducted by the wildlife trade monitoring network TRAFFIC found that most rhino horns leaving South Africa are being smuggled to China and Vietnam.

It has been noted that the spreading Chinese footprint has placed the demand for rhino horn perilously close to the supply, and counter poaching reports have also linked the increase in rhino and elephant killings to a flood of Chinese weapons in Southern Africa.

There are concerns that a state-funded 2008 rhino horn research proposal from China served as one of the catalysts for the surge in rhino killings across Southern Africa by encouraging the use of rhino horn, and that the researchers are attempting to circumvent CITES research provisions by farming rhinos."


THE INJUSTICE.

Link: http://www.rhinoconservation.org/2010/11/18/17-rhinos-found-brutally-slaughtered-in-limpopo-south-africa-another-in-mozambique/

Spin my life around, I stand undaunted

Umbrellas.

Synonyms: Parasols, rainshades, sunshades, gamp, or bumbershoots

Do you know that the name umbrella is derived from the Latin word umbra, meaning shade or shadow? Or that brolly is a slang used in Britain, NZ, Australia and South Africa? Or that para means stop and sol means sun? Or that bumbershoot is just a fancy moniker due to the popularity of Americanism (though I think it should be called mushroom shoots instead)?

Back when I was doing my internship in Kaza, Himachal Pradesh, there was a building in Kaza 2 called Hotel Parasol. I'd always wondered why they called it as such. Why, there were no parasols around even when during the days when the wind is so cold yet the almighty sun is so scorching hot and the rays pierces through your 6 layers of wool and cotton garbs. Then I realized that it was not the presence of the parasols that matter. Once you enter the doors of the hotel, the warmth of the place and the smiles of the tenants soon wins you over. The people are the parasols.

Parasols are the similitude of us. Just as umbrellas provide weather protection, our mein protects us from undesirable situations as well as behaves as a defensive mechanism that can be operated on a whim. True, there can be cheap $2 ones sold at Daiso or those sold at exorbitant prices at branded stores but ultimately, it serves the same purpose - to protect. What defines its longevity is its craftmanship, just like how we hone our skills to hide our true feelings from others.

I will be like this bumbershoot one day instead of the one above. Twirling and twirling happily in the sky. 

Transformed Raven

http://www.iandanielsart.com

This painting from ian daniel, an artist and illustrator known for gothic art amongst others, just encapsulates my life right now. Lucky Raven. At least the Raven received a new lease of life. Some don't.

After my uncle's sudden passing on due to a work accident 40 days ago, I have been thinking about death. Do the souls of the dead know that they are gone from this world, especially when it was due to mischance? Who made the distinction between this and that world anyway? Aren't we ultimately one or another at different periods of time in our lives? Or are we not?

Anguish - please disappear. i want nothing to do with you no more.

to stand on my own once again

Waiting just drains you out.

Darn. Why do I even bother.

I bet it never once occurred that I savour every single memory every night like it never left. I want to keep it fresh. I need to keep it fresh.

Is this how Alzheimer patients feel? Wretched thief robbing them of their precious memories, yet helpless to do anything about it; watching it slip through their wrinkled fingers no matter how hard they strain their frail fingers together to keep it in.

Perfectly fine, I said. Swell, I beamed.

Who am I kidding. Deception is after all how you win a war.